You know those mornings when you wake up feeling a bit crappy? Like – there’s nothing really wrong, and so much you could be happy about. But instead you let your thoughts continue to take you down a path of being negative, looking for things to complain about and picking at your loved ones for doing absolutely nothing wrong?
So often I sit around, wishing I could be happier and waiting for someone to do something about it. Making someone else responsible for my own happiness.
For as long as I can remember I have been waiting to be happy. When I find a boyfriend, then I will be happy. When I finish Uni, then I will be happy. When I find a good job then I will be happy. When I move into the perfect home, then I will be happy. When I can afford to buy all of the clothes I want, then I will be happy. When I have a baby and start a family, then I will be happy.
I became so SICK of sitting around waiting to be happy. Hoping someone or something else would come into my life and somehow everything would be perfect and I would Finally be happy. The truth is, as long as I was waiting for someone or something else to do it for me it was never going to happen.
“Stop waiting for Friday, for summer, for someone to fall in love with you, for life. Happiness is achieved when you stop waiting for it and make the most of the moment you are in now”
You don’t have to wait. Be happy now.
Happiness isn’t just going to appear one day, tapping on your shoulder, Like “Heyyyy! I’m here, now life can begin”. No. You actually have to go out and take some conscious steps to make your life more enjoyable. It took me a long time to realise that if I didn’t make a change in my life, then it was very likely it would never improve, and that my life would look exactly the same in years to come.
I’m not sure what exactly prompted me to do it, but a few weeks ago I decided to make a list of all the things that make me happy. It included things like walking along the beach, watching the sunrise, reading a good book, going out for coffee with a friend, eating AMAZING food (sometimes a little too much), spending time with my family, writing and being creative. I looked back through my list and realised nothing was out of reach, nothing was a far off dream and nothing was hard to do. Literally EVERYTHING I had written on my list were simple things I could do every single day, Hallelujah!!! The answer to being happy was simple.
Or was it? If it was as simple as that to be happy then why isn’t everyone happy, smiling little rays of sunshine? I’m not an expert, but in my opinion, everyone is so caught up on being successful, or having the perfect job, or wanting the next fancy thing that they think will make them happy, that they are missing out on the simple joys of life. Of course we have fleeting moments of feeling truly happy, and that life is perfect but why doesn’t it last? The reality of life kicks in, we put pressure on ourselves, we compare ourselves, we blame ourselves and we constantly feel like we should do more, have more, be more.
Stop comparing yourself to the photo shopped celebrities, the instagram highlight reels which are not real life and the perfect figure’s of models who’s job it is to be super skinny – They miss out on the yummy food! :p My point is, Don’t wish for somebody else’s life – because chances are, its probably not as good as it appears. Focus on your life, all the things you have to be grateful for and happy about. When your thoughts change and you become aware of the things in your life that are amazing, you will start to notice more and more, and over time your mind will automatically think of the positive, rather than the negative – how nice would that be?!
Here are some of the things that have really helped me to be happy, worry less and enjoy more of the simple things in life!
Yes meditate, when I first heard about meditation I thought it was the most ridiculous thing ever! Why would I spend time sitting around, trying not to think about anything, which just makes me think more about EVERYTHING. It definitely takes a lot of practice, and I’m definitely not religious about it. But I try to meditate for about 15 minutes every morning. When I do, I feel a lot calmer, clear-headed and more capable of dealing with stress throughout the day.
Have an attitude of gratitude. Gratitude is the expression of appreciation for what we do have, rather than focusing on what we don’t. When you practice gratitude you are training yourself to easily feel the emotion so you will see the good in life more easily.
Not sure where to start? Here are some ways to practice gratefulness
- Keep a gratitude journal – Write down the top 3 things you are most grateful for everyday.
- Angela Simson; from the gratitude project has an amazing free ebook called 30 days of self love. Every day is a new way to do something for you, be grateful and ultimately happier.
- Be aware of the words you speak and the thoughts you think. THEY MATTER!
- Do one random act of kindness today!
Sleep is soooooo important to your health! And it is so closely related to your mental wellbeing. It’s recommended to get between 7-8 hours of sleep per night. But there are some other important things that help you have a relaxed, good quality sleep.
- Go to bed and wake up at the same time everyday.
- Take a bath before bed to relax
- Turn off harsh light
- No technology or screens for 30 minutes before bed. They trick your brain into thinking its daytime and your body cant relax.
- No caffeine after midday.
Eat real food
If you do only one of these things. Please, please make sure it is improving your diet. Ditch processed, refined food filled with sugar and chemicals and slowly start incorporating more fresh fruit and vegetables into your diet!
If I go one day eating badly and having too much sugar I know about it STRAIGHT AWAY! I feel tired, more moody and of course less happy!
Do the things you love
Write a list of all the things you LOVE to do. And start doing them everyday! Like I said this really made me realise how simple it was to incorporate more of the things I love everyday. Since making more time to get up early, go for a walk, meditate and write more I feel so much happier, I think more positively about life and my days have been a lot more productive.
These things take time, effort and consistency. You can’t meditate for a week, feel awesome and never do it again. Stick at it and I promise your happiness will improve. Because we all deserve to be happy!
Love Bell x